What to look for in a coach
If you think you need a coach but don't know how to determine fit, here are some thoughts.
Coaching has burst onto the church scene in a big way over the past few years. You might be hearing other pastors talk about the difference coaching is making for them. Your colleagues might be urging you to “Get a coach for [insert situation in your context]!” Your congregation’s personnel committee, your head of staff, or your judicatory leader might be requiring you to contract with a coach. The good news is that there are plenty of clergy coaches to choose from. So how do you sift through the possibilities?
Once you have obtained names of coaches from people you trust, your judicatory/denomination, or a web search, here’s what to look for in a great fit:
A sense that the coach sees and values you. This is absolutely essential. Your coach must respect you and your wisdom, skills, and experiences. You want a coach who will gently challenge you at times in order to move you forward, but you definitely do not want one who refutes key aspects of your identity.
Clarity about the difference between coaching and other fields. Coaching is different than (though often works well in tandem with) counseling and spiritual direction. Counseling explores the past to understand hurts and bring healing in the here and now. Coaching begins with the present and asks questions that promote movement into the future. Spiritual direction looks for where God is at work and helps the pray-er let go of whatever is in God’s way. Coaching invites and celebrates the work of the Holy Spirit but also assists the coachee in planning action steps based on the coachee’s God-given strengths and opportunities. Mentoring provides mentees with advice based on the mentor’s experiences. Coaching is focused on the coachees’ contexts and all that they bring to them. You want a coach who understands the coaching lane and respects its boundaries.
Curiosity about you and your goals for coaching. A coach should never assume what a coachee wants to work on, either in the coaching relationship as a whole or in individual sessions. You want a coach who is focused on helping you meet your goals.
Ability to articulate an approach to coaching. A coach is supposed to be an expert on the coaching process, though they do not have to be an expert on the topics discussed in coaching. You want a coach who can explain what the process looks like and how it works.
Candor about what the coach can and cannot do for you. A coach cannot change your life. A coach can help you to change your own life in small and big ways. You want a coach who is committed to the latter and does not promise the former.
Attention to the big picture and to the details. Coaches want to assist you in moving ahead in your specific goal or challenge. To do that well, they need to dig a little deeper on what’s happening beneath the surface and prompt you to broaden your thinking. You want a coach who can attend to both the issue at hand and you as a person, with all the experiences and commitments and hopes that make you unique.
Membership in a professional association of coaches. Coaches encourage other coaches to keep growing in their skills. Professional associations also offer regular continuing education opportunities for their members. (The International Coaching Federation is the most recognizable of these organizations.) You want a coach who has a coaching community, because this shows deep investment in the hands-on work of coaching and in the field of coaching more broadly.
Credentialing. Coaching is still a newer field, so even people with no relevant training can legally call themselves coaches. Credentialing by a body such as the International Coaching Federation, though, can give potential coachees some assurances. Those with an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) credential have had at least 60 hours of coach-specific training, have coached for at least 100 hours, and have had 10 hours of being coached by someone qualified to give feedback on their coaching skills. They have also had to pass an exam and had their coaching evaluated by a highly-trained assessor. Coaches with a Professional Certified Coach (PCC) credential have done all of the above plus an additional 65+ hours of training and 400+ hours of coaching. (For reference, I have than 200 training hours and 1800 coaching hours.) Those with ICF credentials are also held to the ICF’s Code of Ethics in their interactions with coachees. You want a coach who has put in the work to serve you well and who has willingly submitted to behaviors that honor coachees.
When you contract with a great-fit coach, you’ll know it. You’ll feel encouraged and empowered. You’ll see yourself and your situation in new ways, and you’ll act accordingly.
A clergy coach is a great addition to any pastor’s support team. If you’d like to talk with me about coaching, click the link below to schedule an exploratory call.