My word for the year
Spoiler alert: it's "presence."
Last week I hosted an online retreat to go along with the workbook/planner A Year of Intention: Reflection Prompts and Planning Tools for Clergy that I recently published. During introductions I asked each participant to share a word or phrase that they want to guide them in 2024. Mine was “wise as serpents, gentle as doves,” a reference to Matthew 10:16 that I mentioned in last week's post. I think that's more of my general approach to life, though. Upon further reflection, the word I want to orient me this year is “presence.” By this I mean being mentally and emotionally attentive in and to the moment, not multitasking, not desiring to be anywhere else.
That's a hard ask of myself, like it is for many of us. I run my own coaching ministry. I parent a high-energy 10-year-old, along with my husband who also deserves my time. I am about to head into the project year of my Doctor of Ministry program. And all of that is just what's going on within my head and household. There's a whole beautiful, terrible world beyond my front door, and I am called to live in and love it.
But I'm becoming convinced that grounded presence is the only faithful way forward, at least for me. If I am not connected to myself, I'm at risk of being hooked by traumas past and future. If I'm not tuned into God, I'm moving right past (and not returning) the gift of being gazed upon by the Source of all Love, and as a result I won't have a reservoir of love with which to care for others. If I can't simply be with those who are right in front of me, I am dinging the relationships that sustain us all. And if my energy and focus are too scattered, I won't be able to work for the bigger change I want to see.
In a year that promises to be full if not chaotic, I want and need to inhabit every moment. So I will start with a simple breath prayer, comprised of wisdom from Trappist monk Thomas Merton. At regular intervals I will take in life-supporting oxygen as I say, “Love is my true identity.” I will breathe out all that poisons me as I remember, “Love is my name.” As I inhale and exhale, I will work on deepening my breaths so that they come from deep in my belly, not from my chest as they do when I am anxious.
This exercise is first a spiritual one, but it's also practical. When my breathing deepens, my neural pathways open. My thinking won't be held hostage by my reptilian brain but will instead bloom, providing me with access to the creativity that allows me to be my best as a mom, spouse, coach, minister, student, and more.
I invite you to join me in seeking deeper moments of presence this year. Maybe your ways of staying grounded will be different. That's great! But when we can truly value ourselves, see and hear each other, and open our whole beings to God's call on our lives, good in the world will inevitably follow.